Poetry With A Mission

...a thought provoking poetical exercise.

Waggish Poetry

I would like to write a poem, one that’s as funny as can be,
Yes, one that would have people grin — or chuckle, preferably.
In fact, one that would have them all laugh, and very loudly too,
And not just the once, but often — that is, all the way through.

I would love them to clutch their abs, double up and fall about,
They no longer able to stand — too teary eyed, too puffed out.
And amidst it all, attempting to shout, “You’ve gotta read this!”
Wildly waving and pointing their finger for emphasis.

Yes, can you imagine it all? Bodies all over the floor,
And I, flourishing a pen, ecstatically scribbling more.
People begging me to stop, and weakly clawing at my chair,
Midst humour flying shamelessly, and them gasping, “Don’t you dare!”

Okay, I’m getting carried away, but just imagine it,
Infuriatingly funny poetry, and razor wit.
Irresistible poetry that soon has folk howling, “Stop!”
Lest it be, that exhaustedly, on to the carpet they flop.

Yes, I’d love to write a poem, one that’s hilarious to read,
And where the laughter, even noise regulations would exceed.
Okay, not right by my ear, of course, but close enough to hear,
And to feel all the endorphins whizzing about in the air.

I’d stay up late to write such, and would go without sleep and food,
Just to see folk in stitches, and thus change someone’s sombre mood.
I would love to lift their spirits, have them laughing through the day,
Yes, helplessly convulsed, poetically carried away.

I guess it’s my mischievous side — that kid within, you see,
That wants to see people falling about uncontrollably.
But even so, there’s nothing like some fun — waggish poetry,
That for some unknown reason — perhaps impishly — eludes me.

By Lance Landall